What Your Complicated Girlfriend Wants (Without Even Realizing It)

Just when you start to feel like you’re figuring her out - you find another piece to the puzzle that throws everything off. Her mind is complicated, but her heart is another story. She will seem bulletproof, but don’t let her fool you. When she’s in love, she’s in love to the fullest extent. The sassiest girls always have the most sensitive centers. 

She will shy away from telling you how she feels. She tiptoes when you wish she would just walk. You don’t understand how someone so feisty, so full of opinions and fire, can go mute when it comes to matters of the heart. Her hands get damp. She won’t look you in the eye. She doesn’t like the gooey stuff. The clichés. 

She needs the surprises, the romance, but not with some grand gesture you saw in a movie. She’s had to go through a lot of people’s crap, so her hard exterior is just her reaction to the world’s bullshit. Life got complicated and It’s made her rough around the edges, but trust me when I say that she needs your patience more than anyone else. She needs your love. She needs you to show her that you’ll love her through every fight, through every uncertainty. That you’ll keep choosing her. But she’ll never say this. She won’t ask for this. She’ll just make fun of happily ever after. Tell her to shut up and kiss you.

She needs you to understand that she argues with you at inopportune times because she's passionate and emotional, and she cares. It’s easy to get along with someone who always agrees - but you fell for the complicated girl because something about her inspired you to be better. Something about her quick, dark humor made your whole body laugh. Her beauty short-circuited your brain; her wit, it challenged you. Keep that in mind when you fight, when you fall on hard times. When her sass is driving you crazy. Her anger is an aspect of the strong personality you fell for. 

She wants you to make her feel that there is no other woman out there who could love you better. Who you could love more. That she’s the only girl in the world for you. She wants you to make her feel that despite her difficulty, you see the world originally because of her, too. Because she makes you get everything you didn’t even know you wanted out of life. It’s because she’s not easy that she innovates her own life. No one will be more real or more satisfying. No one will make love to you with as much passion. 

Her mind doesn't have an off switch. Sensitivity is her Achilles’ Heel, so she’s put up a lot of walls. That’s how she protects herself. Ignore the snarky comments about how PDA makes her wanna barf, how she’s not the marrying type, or how all good things come to an end. Because she’s secretly a hopeless romantic, in her own way. But none of that will spill out very easily. She doesn’t want the cliché labels: The complicated girl. The one who’s difficult to get to know. The one who keeps you at a distance. Even though she is. She's resilient and sensitive at the same time.

She wants your patience, your steadiness. Spoil her, but don’t put her on a pedestal. She needs you to bite back. She needs a challenge. She needs the stark disagreements, the heated debates. She needs to be told when she’s acting out of line. She needs that extra push. She needs deeper conversations to make her feel alive. 

But above all, don't listen to the sassiness. No matter what she says, love her. And love her all the way.